One More For JC

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the seas, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. (Psalms 46:1-3) To day marks two decades without my Dad.    I can’t believe it’s been that long already, but here we are.   So much has changed in 20 years – including the rise of AI.  Out of sheer curiosity, I just decided to ask it: ‘You don’t get over losing your Dad’ and it responded with:   “You are completely right. You don't ‘get over’ losing your dad; the intense pain doesn't just disappear with time. Instead, grief evolves. The sharp edges soften, and you slowly learn to carry the loss, weaving his memory and the lessons he taught you into the life you continue to build. Navigating this reality is a deeply personal journey, and it is completely normal to feel a mix of sorrow, longing, and gratitude all at o...

Praise the  Lord , my soul,   and forget not all his benefits - who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases.  (Psalms 103:2-3)   For the past two years, Dee and I have been battling problems with our air conditioner.  It all started innocently enough in June 2021 with a “Possible Frozen Coil” error message on the first day of a 10-day brutal heatwave (which is completely unheard of in the frozen tundra).  I called our service plan company immediately and to my chagrin they said their first availability was in 10 days.  By the next morning, my panic over the timing and heatwave reached a boiling point (pun intended), so I decided to call another company.  To their credit, that company sent someone out immediately, but unfortunately the guy didn’t know what he was doing.  Instead of fixing the problem, he only made things worse, leaving behind a bit of a mangled mess.   Over the next couple yea...

He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. (Revelation 21:4)   “Look at the clock!” In my household, that was the universal signal that it was 9:17 PM.  September 17th was my parents’ anniversary and at some point, that became a beautiful tribute to a very special day in the lives of my Dad, Mom, sister, and I.   Unfortunately, after my Dad’s passing in 2006, I haven’t heard those words said again, but I always think about it whenever I happen to catch 9:17 on the clock.  In fact, when I was going back and forth on whether to write this verse app, I came upstairs for a cup of coffee and the clock on the stove just happened to be sitting on 9:17.  I couldn’t help but smile – it was one of those gentle leadings I get from the Lord from time to time, and so I went back downstairs and finally decided to put pen to paper.   Although 9:17 can bring...

For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” (Mark 10:45) On June 20, my mother-in-law, Nancy, passed away at the age of 76.  She left this earth as one of the greatest cooks and seamstresses this world has ever known.  Although her food was legendary, I’ll remember her most for the following three stories.   The first was from October 2005.  At the start of that year, Dee and I both felt a strong desire to reunite our parents for what we felt would be the last time.  We prayed and prayed, and ultimately put together an east coast trip for October.  At the tail end of that trip, the six of us were able to spend a couple days together at Hershey Hotel in Pennsylvania and then spent a day in New York City with a Broadway show and visiting some of the main tourist sites.  We made sure we returned to my parents’ home early enough so Nancy could make her incom...

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God.     (Ephesians 2:8) My Dad wasn’t the biggest Christmas gift shopper, but one year he received a pair of slippers as a gift.     Although they were better suited for his feet, he was insistent that I take them back to Minnesota as his gift to me.     After I offered some resistance for a bit, “They’re your gift,” “They’re a little too big for me,” – I ultimately thanked him and agreed to take them back to the tundra.   Years later, I’m so glad I did.  Every time I look at those slippers, I get to think of my Dad and that gift time and time again.  Although they are still a little too big for me and now have edges fraying left and right, they will always be perfect in my eyes and will remain with me for the rest of my life.   For years, I never thought of them more than just slippers, but this year I got to thi...

Honor your father and mother - which is the first commandment with a promise -   so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.  (Ephesians 6:2-3) It’s been 12 years since I last celebrated my Dad’s birthday.  As my family nestled into a hospice room to sing happy birthday to him that June 8 th , I knew time was short.  I remember all the fears I had of leaving things unsaid, especially those of a spiritual importance.  In one of our conversations that day, my Dad talked about how quickly life goes and urged Dee and I not to waste any of that time, but to fill it with love.  Later that weekend to my surprise, he asked me to bring the bible.  I went home to get it, rushed back, and prayed for the Lord’s guidance to help me find the most meaningful scriptures to share with my Dad.  After a while, I finally worked up the nerve to ask him if he knew where he was going. As he pointed to the sky, I assured him ...

And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age. (Matthew 28:20) A few nights ago, Dee and I were doing some cleaning and we came across a sealed envelop with just the single name “Frankie” on the outside.  Only a handful of people call me Frankie, so I knew it was likely something from either my parents or sister.  As I opened it up, I found a few pictures from a Christmas about 8 years back.  I started flipping through them and saw one of me smiling from ear to ear as I held up a new Mets sweatshirt.  I flipped to another one and saw me smiling from ear to ear with my new scarlet Rutgers tie.  I thought it was just going to be a collection of me celebrating my misery with all of my beloved losing teams, but soon it would come to mean so much more than that.  Towards the end of the pile, I came to two pictures of me opening gifts with my Dad and I sitting side-by-side.  I thought for sure I’d start to cry, but I didn’t.  Comi...

She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.  She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.   Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all. Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.   Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate. (Proverbs 31:26-31) Today my Mom celebrates another birthday.  Unfortunately, I won’t be able to celebrate it with her in person, but I will certainly be with her in spirit.  My Mom is just one of those very special people, who has always put her children (and now her grandchildren) first.  That example of sacrifice has left an indelible mark on me that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.  The Lord has blessed me with so many great things over the year...

And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age. (Matthew 28:20) My first Father’s Day without my Dad in 2007 wasn’t a good one.  I was like a fish without water, without that father to call or thank you card to fill out.  I remember receiving my first Father’s Day marketing email with spite, and questioned the nerve of that company to send me that note with him being gone. Five years later I still receive those emails and there is still no Dad to call, but the feelings of emptiness and bitterness are gone.  The pure fact of the matter is that my Dad will always be with me – his example of dedication, work ethic, and fatherly love is in every fabric of my being (that no cancer cell can ever take away). So with each new Father’s Day that comes along, I no longer cower away from it.  I make sure to take time out for a prayer of thanks to the Lord…to thank Him for all the wonderful years with my Dad, and for providing me an example here on earth...

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.  Honor your father and mother - which is the first commandment with a promise - so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” (Ephesians 6:1-3) I’m sure anyone who loves baseball and their Dad had no remorse over shedding a tear at the end of Game 6 of the World Series last night in St. Louis.  As the game winning home-run in an epic comeback was nearing its descent over the wall, Joe Buck took us back 20 years to one of the greatest announcing calls ever made, when his father, Jack Buck proclaimed: “And we’ll see you tomorrow night!” at the end of Game 6 of the 1991 World Series.  Although it’s a tribute he’s done before, the timing and delivery of it last night was just perfect.  If the games didn’t have lasting significance in their own right, now, every time I think of Game 6 of either 1991 or 2011, I’ll think of that special bond between a father and son that ...

Rejoice in the Lord always.  I will say it again:  Rejoice! (Philippians 4:4) For the first time in 30 years, the family pool remained closed throughout the summer of 2006. It seemed only appropriate that one of the family symbols of joy and celebration would remain silent…especially at a time of such sorrow with the passing of both my Dad and Grandmother. To be honest, deep-down I never wanted that pool to be opened again. In my mind, it just would never be the same without my Dad, who had labored so hard to keep it going for three decades. Despite my internal objections, my sister pressed to have the pool opened last summer and then again this year.  I found the desire to go in it just briefly last summer, but a couple weeks ago, a “quick dip” on a Saturday evening became something much more than that.  As the sun was setting on a perfect night, one bright star began to shine brightly in the cloudless sky.  As I stared at it intently, I could hear the Lo...

Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (2 Corinthians 12:9-10) Unfortunately, far too frequently these days I’m hearing of another person battling cancer.  My heart goes out to each and every one of you (both the patients and the care-givers), especially after all of the trials my family endured a couple years back with my Dad and Grandmother.  At the height of the battle, I remember sitting in a church service during one of my trips to New Jersey and being completely lost in despair.  I had just left my Dad’s hospital room and it was becoming all too clear that the odds of survival were aga...

If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father's commands and remain in his love. (John 15:10) I went to my niece’s 1-year old birthday party over the weekend in which my sister put together a beautiful collection of pictures set to music.  At the end of the presentation, she included a tribute to the members of the family that we had lost over the years – the most prominent of which being my Dad.  Not too many days go by where I don’t think of him, and all the good times we shared.  I also think back to some of the amazing events that transpired at the end of his life; one of which occurred on the morning of his viewing, just as I was sinking into perhaps the saddest moment of my life.  I remember wondering how I would find the strength to make it through the next couple days, as I happened to turn on the radio.  Remarkably within seconds, a song named “Father’s Love” by Bob Carlisle came on that I had never heard be...

I thank my God every time I remember you. (Philippians 1:3) Every once in awhile a song will come out that really hits home; Bon Jovi’s latest single “ (You Want To) Make A Memory ” is one of those songs.  From the first time I heard it, I couldn’t help but think back to last year, when I spent a lot of time trying to do just that.  A day that really sticks with me was my birthday last April, when my Dad played the keyboard and my family sang me Happy Birthday in both English and Polish (an annual tradition).  When I blew out the candles on that birthday cake, I had a feeling it was going to be the last time I did so with my Dad and Grandmother.  I cherished every moment of that song and that night, and tried to “make a memory” that would last a lifetime. Unfortunately, this April 15 th , the seat at the keyboard was empty and there were two less voices in the chorus.  But thankfully the good Lord Jesus was by my side again that day, and I had the rest ...

The Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many. (Mark 20:28) August 24th has always been one of the most special days in the calendar year for me, solely because that was the day my Mom was born.  Throughout my life, my Mom has been a shining example of what loving, giving, serving, and sacrificing is all about…especially this year when she faced a husband and mom both dying of cancer at the same time.  For months, her days and nights were spent selflessly attempting to do anything in her power to make life just a little bit easier for both of them until their passing. Although the battle was long and incredibly hard, it helped me appreciate my Mom all the more.  This side of heaven, I've come to realize I probably won't encounter another person like her; someone with such relentless determination to serve others - no matter the personal cost.  But thankfully, one day I know I will again, when I come face to...

I am returning to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God. (John 20:17) This morning, my Dad passed away after a long fight with cancer.  Although the battle was hard, it helped bring me even closer to him and to my family…and for that I’ll forever be grateful. Today, I choose not to remember the hard times at the end of his life, but only the good.  I remember my Dad being at every baseball game I ever played (and there were many), I remember him driving his old car around town (even holding the door shut as he drove) while my sister and I drove around in the new cars he bought us, I remember him driving me to and from my graduate school classes after I broke my ankle and stating " You're my son, where else would I rather be?" , and I remember more; yes so much more. Forever, I will cling to the memory of what a wonderful father he was; how selfless, how loving.  He may not have been a perfect human being, but in my mind he will always be cherished...

The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. (John 1:14) When my sister gave birth to my nephew a couple years back, I remember joking with my mom – “We can now call you Babcia too!”  Her response was swift and immediate: “There is only one Babcia!”  How right she was.  For those of you not of Polish descent, Babcia is the Polish equivalent of grandmother; for my family, that term of endearment will forever belong to one, and only one, person – my grandmother Dorothy.  Sadly, the true meaning of that has hit home all the more of late with her serious battle with cancer, a fact that was confirmed a day before her 80 th birthday celebration in October.  It was a bittersweet day for me, knowing the sad truth that only my parents and I knew at the time, and yet being thankful to cherish every moment of that party all the more. For me, just...

Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.  (Psalms 9:10) What a difference a couple months can make.  On April 1 st , I received a phone call I hoped would never come – that one of my parents was being rushed to the hospital.  The next morning when I talked to my Dad at perhaps his lowest moment, I honestly didn’t know if it would be our last conversation.  My mind started looking to record each word that was said - that I might be able to replay it for the rest of my life.  When I hung up the phone, a feeling of helplessness came upon me like never before.  But thankfully, that feeling passed quickly as I knelt down before the Lord in prayer, and asked for his healing power to descend upon that hospital room in New Jersey.  I prayed for another chance to see my Dad, for another chance to hug him hello, and for another chance to sing him Happy Birthday.  It didn’t take long for the ...

Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”  (Exodus 20:12) Last Saturday, my family threw a surprise birthday party to celebrate my Dad’s 75 th .  It was an extremely emotional day for me as I spent most of it thinking back on all of the wonderful memories I’ve shared with my parents over the years.  I counted my blessings as I thought back on all of the sacrifices they’ve made for me, and prayed that they knew how much each one was appreciated. I could go on listing each one individually, but it would take up too many pages.  The example of love, sacrifice, and devotion they have shown to my sister and me from day one has made the fulfillment of this commandment an easy one; for any child not to honor and respect these two parents would be a travesty.  Although I honor them from afar now, the 1,008 miles of separation only makes me love and appreciate them all the more.  The one m...